Does everyone have an opportunity to have a relationship with God (the universe) regardless of their past.
Yes, everyone has an opportunity each and every single moment to have a relationship with God, regardless of their past.
Now, this is not the conventional relationship, because to be in a relationship with God, you must realize you ARE God. The only way to be able to communicate with God or consciousness is to realize that who you think you are is an illusion. When that is seen and realized, then God is also realized. And you realize you ARE God.
So most relationships are between 2 separate entities, but to have a relationship with God is to realize you are God and have a relationship with yourself, if you want to call it that. We can simply disregard the concept 'relationship' because it is unnecessary. You don't really want a relationship with God, as if you are separate. You want to be in unity with God, and for that you must realize you ARE God.
The past is literally just an idea, so if you choose to simply disregard it and not believe it, stop identifying with it which perpetuates it; God can be realized in an instant, regardless of the 'past'.
I've just been feeling really guilty lately and as if my existence on earth has been negative and I've caused more harm than good.
Well, it is true. Your existence as a separate self, as a personality, separate from God IS causing more harm than good. Actually, it causes ONLY harm. It can't do any good, because it (personal identity) is a limitation of power and intelligence, and is the root of all suffering, ignorance and delusion. It is good that you feel guilty, because without this guilt, you would continue shamelessly perpetuating ignorance, delusion and suffering. This is an opportunity to realize the damage that the belief in separation/delusion is causing.
I recently left religion and have been trying to start my spiritual journey but I'm not hearing back from God.
Of course, you will never hear back from God because you are identifying as a separate self, a limited intelligence. Even if God was speaking, you wouldn't recognize it, you wouldn't be able to comprehend the infinite intelligence of God. Not only that, but the separate self/personality that you are identifying with, serves as a filter that filters out infinite intelligence and information that would allow you to see the truth, that you are not seeing clearly.
I think I believe in a higher power but I don't believe in any specifics about the nature of God and my spiritual beliefs are not too strong tbh. I want the universe to guide me and help me unlock my blessings and manifest a good future but I don't know how to go about it and I dont know If I deserve it.
The universe will not guide YOU, because the "you" that you take yourself to be is an illusion. The universe doesn't guide an illusion, and the real when realized doesn't need any guidance. Right now, you ARE that universe that you want to be guided by, but you are overlooking your true self which is the universe/God in favor of the personality that you have been conditioned to believe that you are; which in reality is actually just an idea, a concept, there is no such entity with a personality present. The only 'entity' present is awareness. That awareness has no personality, and that awareness that is being aware of this text right now is your true self. The personality that you think you are is just an idea appearing, coming and going within that awareness that is what you truly are as God.
If you identify with that idea of a personality, and you believe that is what you are, you will experience as if you are that personality, but once you withdraw your identification with that personality, and simply look; you realize there is no actual personality, it only appears so because you keep believing it exists, and that literally makes it appear as if it exists. If you don't believe it exists, you don't identify with any personality, it is absolutely clear there is no personality by itself, without your identification, and there is just an awareness, that awareness IS God.
You claim to be a separate self that has 'locked blessings'; these blessings won't be unlocked as long as you are identifying with the personality that is literally just an idea. If you choose to stop identifying with personality, God will be realized, and all of its blessings, talents, love, joy, peace, compassion, wisdom, unconditional fulfillment and bliss will be revealed.
There is no need to take care of the future, because when you realize you are God, everything is happening by itself, and there is no one to take care of the future. The infinite intelligence that is the source of this 'universe' is already taking care of everything automatically effortlessly, without actually 'doing' anything like a personality would. The personality that you believe that you are wants to 'do' the future. But when it is realized, that the personality doesn't actually exist, then who is left to do the future? There is no one present, there is no person. There is literally just an awareness, and a dream unfolding automatically by itself appearing within it.
The separate self/personality that you believe you are, does not deserve God, does not deserve a good future nor does it deserve anything at all, because in reality it doesn't exist. Something that doesn't exist, can't possibly deserve anything.
There are so many different approaches and everyone has different advice but so far I have only utilized prayer. Is spirituality possible for me? Is my belief in God not strong enough? Is my pessimism and me clinging to my past mistakes holding me back from God? Does God not want to help me or guide me? Does God want me to change? What is God's nature like?
Spirituality is not possible for who you think you are. What you think you are is literally the opposite of spirituality. Spirituality is about Truth, while what you think you are is all about delusion. So there is no way for what you think you are to cooperate with spirituality. There must be a decision by the God 'in you' to see clearly that personality doesn't exist and never perpetuate it by identifying with any thought, emotion, sensation, perception or experience ever again.
Belief in God is absolutely useless, what you really want is to realize God as your very own self. There is no need for belief. You only believe something because you don't know. When you know, you don't need to believe.
Nothing is holding you back from God, except that you think you are separate from God. You are ALREADY that which is being aware, and that IS God. But you must not believe that you are a personality/personal identity/separate self within that awareness, you must see that you are the awareness itself, and everything appearing within that awareness is not what you are. It is just a coming and going appearance. If it is coming and going, how can it be you? You are that which is ever-present, which knows all the coming and going phenomena. You must be that ever-present awareness, because literally everything else comes and goes.
Lets take for an example a dream. Who are you while dreaming? While dreaming, there is no personal identity. There is simply a dream unfolding by itself, and an awareness/consciousness of it. That awareness/consciousness has no personal identity. That consciousness/awareness is present in the dream and it is present now also.
The personal identity appears only in the waking state, so how can it possibly be you? It comes and goes, but the consciousness/awareness is ever-present. You are present and aware of dreams where personal identity is not. Obviously you ARE that awareness/consciousness, and you have nothing to do with personal identity. It is literally just more content appearing in a dream. Just like in a dream there can be content appearing in which there is a body-mind which is able to fly, the same way, there can be content appearing in which there is a personality. Personality is just coming and going content, it is not what you are. You are that which knows the personality, therefore you can't be the personality. The personality is literally just an idea. It is not an entity.
God does not want to help/guide you because the 'you' that is asking for help/guidance doesn't actually exist. The guidance will be to KILL by seeing that the 'you' that you think you are doesn't actually exist. So we can't say that the guidance is for the 'you' that you think you are, the guidance is for the god in you to see clearly that the 'you' that you think you are aka personality doesn't actually exist. The personality is what wants guidance, but it is literally the source of all ignorance, suffering and delusion. It is not going to change. The nature of personality which is a coming and going idea, is to be insecure, lacking, anxious, delusional and suffering, because it is not real. There is no point to help the personality because the personality is literally just an idea.
It is like asking to help a unicorn. You are not going to help a unicorn, because it doesn't actually exist. How can you help something that doesn't exist? How can you guide something that doesn't exist? It is impossible. What must be seen is that the unicorn is just an idea, it is not real and therefore can't be helped.
God doesn't want you (personality) to change, God wants you to die. As long as personality is, there is limitation, ignorance, suffering, delusion, selfishness and all evil. The personality can't change in the first place as it is a program. It can't make any significant change. It can be modified to believe something else, but that is not what you really want anyway. What you really want is the infinite unconditional love, peace, joy, compassion, wisdom, fulfillment and bliss of your true infinite Buddha nature that is God. You don't want to be a personality, because as long as you believe you are a personality you will suffer and be limited.
There is no point of speaking about the nature of God because it will be just registered as concepts. It will not be experiential and therefore quite useless. People talk of God as being "Love" and yet nobody realls knows what the hell that even means. They just speak about it as if they know what they are talking about even though there is no actual such experience. So me telling you that the nature of God is unconditional love, doesn't amount to much. It is better to directly realize it and experience it by choosing to never again identify with thoughts, emotions, sensations, perceptions and experiences which is what creates personal identity, and of course to see that the personal identity that you currently believe you are doesn't actually exist, it is a coming and going appearance. It is not what you are. You are that ever-present which knows it. That which is being aware. That is God. Remain as that without believing you are anything else, and if you earnestly do this even for a single moment, you will know unconditional love. Debt of 1750$; Support by donating any amount, joining the Patreon or scheduling a session with the infinite Buddha nature that I am; whatever you prefer. https://www.paypal.com/donate?hosted_button_id=WR94GY38N2ENC
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