Hello love, yes, I understand. There are still remnants of the old self, and sometimes they appear as the thought, emotion, and sensation manifesting in the form of a desire to have a dating life, or to find a partner, or to attain some status, or to achieve financial success, or to be a better person, whatever it may be.
The most important thing you must realize is in fact that these are merely thoughts that are put there for you to transcend it. You must be able to acknowledge that there is that which is perceiving the thoughts, and that automatically means that the perceiver itself is perceived. You are not that thought, that desire, that urge, you are not that who is having trouble with dating, you are not the one for whom it appears to be hard to meet someone to share an appearing interest with.
What you are, is that vast consciousness, pure consciousness in which all these thoughts, emotions, sensations, and even the sense of identity appear. The "I" removes the "I" so there remains the "I". What does it mean?
"I" - pure consciousness, that which is true, the essential "I" removes the personal sense of identity "I" which is ego, false, delusional so there remains only the "I" pure consciousness. You must see this in the same way, you are that pure consciousness and this person that appears on the screen of consciousness is not yourself, itself is observed, and so you are able to be detached, realizing that in fact there is no person having trouble, no problems at all, you realize all problems are perceived in that which you are.
You can't even have any problem, because a problem would appear on the screen of consciousness, while you are off-screen, behind, watching that which is watching. You are both the one experiencing the play of consciousness (appearing to be interacting, touching, smelling) and also the witness of the play, meaning you are completely behind the screen, ever-present and silent. You must simply remain aware of the ever-present awareness that you truly are. We usually get caught up in the sense of the one experiencing, and we appear to identify with the one experiencing, forgetting that we are actually the witness of the experiencing also. Just by seeing this alone, that in fact the "person" that you think you are, is perceived in pure consciousness, the person is a coming and going phenomena, always changeful, it appears to be an entity but actually it is like an imaginary friend (that causes endless suffering and ignorance and arrogance) The problem appears when we believe we ARE the imaginary friend, we forget that actually, this imaginary friend appears in consciousness, and if this appearing friend continues to put us in trouble (creating thoughts, emotions, sensations, identity, and personal problems) then we must simply see that the imaginary friend is not real and not actually existing, and be that which we truly are, pure consciousness. Pure consciousness has no identification with thoughts, emotions, sensations, personal identity, problems, for all these are appearing phenomena WITHIN the pure consciousness, and that pure consciousness is essentially what you are. You are that in which it all appears, you are completely empty, it takes only a single moment of recognition, intuitively you already know this, because you are in fact, the pure consciousness. To reclaim your true self back (pure consciousness) you must discern between the imaginary friend (psychological-mind) and yourself. The psychological-mind uses thoughts, emotions, and sensations to distract you from the present moment, it is important to say that in fact, it can't distract you, it can only distract you if you give the mind the power of your belief. The power of belief of pure consciousness can make it appear as if you are the person appearing in consciousness, instead of the consciousness itself. So the psychological-mind does not want to disappear, in fact, it will do anything possible to appear in your presence. It will bombard you with negative thoughts, emotions, sensations, all for you to pay some attention to it. It might do the opposite, and bombard you with positive thoughts, emotions, and sensations, for you to pay some attention to it. Either way, if you believe and follow that which the mind is offering you, you will be playing right into its intentions of making you unconscious so it keeps existing and feeding off of your attention and interest. The most important thing for the pure consciousness to be able to stabilize in its own true nature, in its own silence, its own pure emptiness, it must develop the power of discernment, the consciousness must be able to realize that itself is never anything appearing within the consciousness, but is the consciousness itself. It is extremely simple, the consciousness must simply stay consistent, the mind will come with a storm but that storm is there to strengthen your seeing so that you will become truly unshakeable.
These tests are necessary for you to mature in the true understanding of the self, and not become complacent. Once pure consciousness is aware of itself and is able to easily and effortlessly to simply perceive the appearances of the mind, instead of identifying, believing, or interacting with them, then you have arrived at the true nature of the self. Of course, you were always the self, it simply takes some "work" to discard the mind, you can't completely take it all and discard it, and so it will keep coming until every single bit of dust is taken care of and cleaned by the pure consciousness.
This process is an absolutely beautiful happening in which you reclaim your own true self, truly the highest perceivable appearing in the human kingdom. Pure consciousness is what you ever-presently are, the person who you think you are is coming and going, to know you are timeless and eternal beyond belief, but in direct experience, it is absolutely a miracle, and yet it mustn't be so, awakening to the true self and embodying the true self is very simple, but it is a question of earnestness. Every single being who seeks the true self will with no doubt embody it, actually, the whole universe conspires for you to make this one discovery.
- Sebastian Key
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